Heads alternative executive branch as masked vigilante.
Tackles advocacy work for incarcerated Illinois governors.
Takes up the ballet that Rahm abandoned.
Unsuccessfully petitions Dan Sinker to start a Twitter feed about him.
Aborts attempt to speak on the national circuit when no one outside Cook County can understand Chicago accent.
Builds giant robot, contemplates overthrowing world, skips it.
Embraces civilian life as a chance to let hair return to its natural state.
Pioneers new sport of spelunking the city’s potholes.
Takes one last victory lap, concludes by climbing each of the city’s public art works.