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Putting Chicago’s Baby Name Matchmakers to the Test

Naming your child is an intensely personal decision. That’s why you should totally pay someone to do it for you.

Illustration by John Kenzie
Illustration: John Kenzie

With their new service Future Perfect, two local moms —  Macaire Douglas and Chicago contributor Cara Sullivan  —  help solve baby-naming conundrums. We tested them with three scenarios.

Challenge:Millennial couple seeks hashtaggable name with no heteronormative affiliation.
Solution:XEN
Not Jen, not Ben, just Xen. Free of the confines of assigned identity, this child is woke AF.

Challenge:Euchre-playing, artisanal pickling couple requests name for accidental girl. Must look good tattooed and on a résumé.
Solution:DAHLIA
Mom can get the bloom inked on her arm. Dad can have the letters scripted across his chest.

Challenge:Him: Two adult children from previous marriage named John and Julia. Her: First baby, loves city names like London and Austin.
Solution:JAMESON
It sounds like a place, but no one has to tell Mom it isn’t. She can call him by his full name; Pop can shorten it to James.

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