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Behold, the Reckless Holiday Gift Guide

Every fall, we assemble a holiday gift guide—a carefully curated selection of 75 or so trendy suggestions for everyone on Santa’s list. In the weeks leading up to the issue, hundreds and hundreds of companies—and their dutiful publicity reps—come out of the woodwork with items for consideration. For every 100 or so pitches, there’s always one real gem. Here, we’ve taken 13 of the funniest items off the cutting room floor and assembled—dare I say—a Reckless Holiday Gift Guide…

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Adult footed pajamas with drop seat, $44.95, at pajamacity.com
What is it? Foot-in pajamas for adults
Press release says: “We have a great holiday gift idea—footed pajamas! They are fun, affordable, useful, and available to fit ALL body types—from tall to short and thick. These PJs will help adults everywhere rediscover their own childhood . . . Not only are they cozy and well made, they are practical, because the warmth they provide is also a good way to keep the heating bills down.”


Horse car floor mats, $17.99, at collectionsetc.com
What is it? The name says it all
Press release says: From the user reviews, “Pros: Extremely attractive. Durable.” Cons: No cons. Best uses: “They look great in my old car.”


Emergency Bra, $29.99, at ebbra.com
What is it? A bra that converts into a gas mask. Developed right here in Chicago.
Press release says: “In case of emergency, it can be quickly and easily converted into two face masks without removing any clothes. In case of emergency, where no specialized respiratory devices are available, it can decrease the inhalation of harmful airborn particles. Because the Emergency Bra masks can be securely fixed to the head, it frees a survivor’s hands to keep balance while running and removing objects on the way out of danger.”


CamelNot by Brava, $5.99 for 3, at wardrobesupplies.com
What is it? A bourgeoisie panty liner
Press release says: “Let’s face it: even though it is a faux pas, sometimes “camel toe” happens anyway. With Camel Not, you can wear leggings or skinny jeans without having to worry about the fashion police. . . ‘Camel toe’ is the result of tight clothing revealing too much about a woman’s private region—hence revealing a shape that resembles a camel toe. Today’s fashions—including leggings with shorter skirts, skinny jeans, and other tight pants, or shorts, and the fact that it is even more fashionable in some circles to go bare down there, makes it easier for camel toe to creep up.”



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